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Gay Parents Come Out 
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In the past most gay parents have remained secretive and protective, and 
for very good reasons. Our children had often been conceived in the context 
of heterosexual relationships, and a gay parent had to face not only his or her 
own coming out issues and the need to separate from a spouse, but also 
contend with coming out to children. If a custody battle ensued, often gay 
parents were fighting a losing battle in a homophobic court system. The legal 
and social stigma is finally improving for gay people coming out who have 
had children in previous heterosexual marriages, and more people are able to 
be honest about the nature of their families. 
In the last two decades many self-identified gay and lesbian people, single 
and in couples, have actively chosen to have children outside of a socially
approved heterosexual marriage. Some have had children using artificial
insemination (also known as alternative reproduction -- to alleviate the stigma 
of the word artificial); others have chosen to adopt. Although many people 
still remain secretive about their sexuality or relationships, many of these 
lesbian and gay families are out about who they are. This means they are 
showing up in fertility clinics for information about attempting pregnancy, they 
are coming to adoption agencies stating clearly the nature of their family, they 
are going to attorneys for information on second parent same-sex adoption, 
and they are going to PTA meetings and little league games with the same
enthusiasm as other parents. 
The impact this lesbian and gay baby boom will have on the next generation 
is enormous. Whatever your personal politics, or emotional reactions, the reality 
is that all over our country gay and lesbian people are birthing, nurturing, 
and raising children that will be playing in the same playgrounds, attending 
the same schools, and challenging all of us to deal with this new level of 
diversity.